inside the ruined room

i could not hold my arms up any higher. i thought that i should wave but they were too far to have seen me, they were all too far. i wish some people wouldn't come here anymore, like the school children who sit with their mouths open watching the ceiling splinter into my skin and they just watch and listen. if i could feel less, i would start out into the street without my jacket and hope for the rain to sit next to me on the bench where it would tell me that all of my life has been wasted on standing in the frozen fields without purpose. i have stood here with everyone else, only they wanted me to speak louder and i said that i was moving to the sound of the stars as they sprinkled up against the old rooftops and they said that i was messed up and they threw me out into the song because they said "you must like pretty songs" and that's where they left me but i can't sing and i can't dance so all of this, everything is pointless. it makes sense, i make sense. but i don't belong. i don't fit into the yellow. you say it's looking dimmer and dimmer the further down we go. i think you’re onto something.